Chris Long, born in Battersea when it used to be a smoky black and white, is a freelance, er, person? He sort of does TV and radio production, journalism, photography, and other stuff. But mostly sort of wonders really what he REALLY does. Y’know, really. He likes eating and, naturally, drinking, but wonders – as he types this – is that really how one should describe oneself? Especially in the third person? It would be fair to say that he doesn’t really enjoy writing 100-word biographies of himself. OK, he has three O Levels and seven CSEs – does that help?